Good Ideas Happen in the Bath
It never fails. I'm halfway through my shower or bath, when I get this flood of ideas and words and I need to run out of the shower wrapped in a towel and plop my fingers down on a keyboard to get some of this out. I know the science behind it and yet it always amuses me. It's not a habit that lends itself to a 9-5 work schedule. But maybe it's the habit that is beginning to help me understand where I actually get my joy from.
I've been struggling to draw again. I'm having this strange realization, as I sit there countless times, both disgusted and horrified by my quality of drawings, that I'm not enjoying myself. I'm not enjoying creating visual art, and that's... also horrifying. Drawing is how I've defined a joyful activity for myself since I was between three and four years old. What is wrong with my brain that I find it utterly... boring now? Is this just a stage of the multipotentialite brain, that I find myself completely turned off by an activity until I really enjoy it again? Or is it a signifier of a deeper problem?
I'm going to bank on getting the inspiration again, maybe in a few days, but it's still going to be a struggle. Having these dips in interest and attention is not a good way to approach any art. Sustained, deep, passionate interest is the only way to every become truly good at something. And so I worry that I'm always going to be in this sort of "jack of all trades" purgatory.
But I tend to still get excited about writing. When I don't tell anyone I'm doing it.
You see, I hate the idea that everyone thinks that everything I say is dumb or pretentious. It completely steals the joy out of anything I do; it makes doing it actually terrifying. That's why I complete so many poems. They're so fast; by the time I catch them, they're done, and there's no time to tell someone else that I'm working on them. I read something yesterday that psychologists have proven that people who accomplish a lot don't talk about it. Those that tell the world about what they're working on are far less likely to complete their projects. I think there's some strong truth there, for me.
Ideas and developing talents- they're butterfly's-wing-delicate. It's hard to sustain them on the wind with your own breath when someone comes around and blows a gale of opinions at them.
I'm not finished with trying to draw. However, I might be more inspired with trying to write. It seems like there's still some joy there.
-j
I've been struggling to draw again. I'm having this strange realization, as I sit there countless times, both disgusted and horrified by my quality of drawings, that I'm not enjoying myself. I'm not enjoying creating visual art, and that's... also horrifying. Drawing is how I've defined a joyful activity for myself since I was between three and four years old. What is wrong with my brain that I find it utterly... boring now? Is this just a stage of the multipotentialite brain, that I find myself completely turned off by an activity until I really enjoy it again? Or is it a signifier of a deeper problem?
I'm going to bank on getting the inspiration again, maybe in a few days, but it's still going to be a struggle. Having these dips in interest and attention is not a good way to approach any art. Sustained, deep, passionate interest is the only way to every become truly good at something. And so I worry that I'm always going to be in this sort of "jack of all trades" purgatory.
But I tend to still get excited about writing. When I don't tell anyone I'm doing it.
You see, I hate the idea that everyone thinks that everything I say is dumb or pretentious. It completely steals the joy out of anything I do; it makes doing it actually terrifying. That's why I complete so many poems. They're so fast; by the time I catch them, they're done, and there's no time to tell someone else that I'm working on them. I read something yesterday that psychologists have proven that people who accomplish a lot don't talk about it. Those that tell the world about what they're working on are far less likely to complete their projects. I think there's some strong truth there, for me.
Ideas and developing talents- they're butterfly's-wing-delicate. It's hard to sustain them on the wind with your own breath when someone comes around and blows a gale of opinions at them.
I'm not finished with trying to draw. However, I might be more inspired with trying to write. It seems like there's still some joy there.
-j
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